Well, we may be making some progress in this “journey of life”; the unplanned trip to who knows where.
Yesterday, I attended South Muskoka Memorial Hospital, in Bracebridge, to donate yet another part of my anatomy for medical research and diagnostic purposes. The medical practitioners had determined a need for some body fat for a biopsy to help establish exactly what may be wrong with me.
A fine young general surgeon was assigned to my case. Among his other duties, he does a significant number of colonoscopies, and yesterday he had done a significant number before he saw me; I was a last minute addition to his already long day. After being escorted into the operating room, he explained that body fat, for the needs of this type of biopsy, could come from a number or sources; the heart, abdominal fat plate or rectum. I suggested, knowing how he had spent most of his day, that I was prepared to provide a different perspective of the human anatomy. So, abdominal fat plate it was.
The whole thing is done with local anaesthetic and takes about 25 minutes. This is a totally painless procedure with no major lasting effects other than a little tenderness in the belly. It does however bring to the front a significant question.
Why is it that every time a doctor needs to take a sample for a biopsy, it must come from an area of the body that is usually covered by something that chafes?
A bone marrow biopsy is taken from the back of your pelvis, right where your underwear elastic and belt come into contact with your body. The same applies to the abdominal fat plate biopsy, except it’s anterior rather than posterior.
I’ve come up with the solution; don’t wear underwear and do wear suspenders.
See you again soon.
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